My dear Nellie,

It's already 10 days since you've been gone, and Life seems to have lost all its meaning.

Almost unbelievable that a teeny-tiny being like you, can leave behind such a deep void..

You aroused a motherly instinct in me and together we shared so many beautiful-loving experiences,

in just a span of four years you gave me a lifetime worth of memories

and with it, the sadness that i didn't get a chance to say Goodbye

Never will we know, what happened on the night that you disappeared without a trace.

The pain is still so intense, that it feels like my Heart will just burst open,

instead as tears - silent streams or loud gushes - the pain pours out from my eyes...

Sometimes i wonder, the time we shared together - was a beautiful Gift - something to be celebrated,

But why, oh why, does it then hurt so bad?

Because the Greedy mind wanting more of these loving experiences, is not yet ready to let go.

Over the last 10 days, we've independently felt your presence/essence in many a ways..

A breeze that suddenly engulfs us; Rays of Sunlight suddenly appearing from behind a Cloud;

Your tiny self in that vision of yours on the Cellar door, supervising us on our renovation-progress (as you always did);

A giant version of you curled up, hoovering over - covering the entire House, the surroundings, consoling us;

Seeing you as that Tibetan Monk walking away into the unknown from your special forest;

The vision of You, a young tibetan Monk and Ramana Maharshi in a Row...

As if to say,

you're there - around us - in us - have always been and will always be -

We just have to go within our Hearts...

AUM TAT SAT